Monday, April 29, 2013

Visiting: being visited.

Many of my TCK memories involve people visiting us where we lived. Grandparents, aunts, cousins, family friends, they've all come. For them it was a easy and cheaper holiday; going somewhere far away and exotic with free accommodation and a free tour guide. The place I called home was a holiday destination for them, a place they had always dreamed of visiting. We always had a good time; my parents pulled out all the stops to show their friends and family the best time. We would go out to eat more often, go to all the fun places, and sometimes even have trips away to nearby destinations. As I got older though, I sometimes found it overwhelming. All of a sudden, there would be a few more people in the house, and my daily routine would be completely disrupted. I love my family and our friends dearly, but when you're put in close quarters for three weeks at a time, it can get a bit much. My family always tended to fall out when we had visitors. My mom would feel like everything needed to be perfect, which meant that my brother and I would act out more just to annoy her. It always had a strain on the family, although we never showed our visitors that.

There was always a common trend with visitors; they always came towards the end of our stay. As soon as we said "we're moving next year", the visitors would start coming. They would suddenly realize that their opportunity to go on a cheap holiday was slipping away, and they would all try to come at the same time.  By this time, my family would be planning the move to a new place. Visitors and moving do not tend to mix well. As a example, I'll take you back to when I was in 10th grade. At the end of 10th grade, we were moving from Beijing to Hanoi. I was finishing up my MYP program, so I was very busy with school work, and on top of that I was leaving behind the closest friend group that I'd ever had. During our last month there, my cousin, aunt, and grandmother came to visit. Personally struggling with leaving while feeling like I had to put on a happy face for them was really hard. I love them all dearly, but the timing was the worst.

I suppose the point that I'm trying to get across is that while being visited is routine when being a TCK, it's not always easy. I realize that this post points out more negative then positive things about being visited. Don't get me wrong, I have had amazing memories of family and friends coming to visit. It's just that I wanted to point out that being visited is not always easy.

In a few days I'm leaving to the Netherlands for a few days. So, I'll be the one visiting! I'll write a blog post on that side of it, for a little bit of balance. So keep a look out!

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